Feeling disconnected from your partner: Intimacy, sex and connection after birth trauma or NICU | S3E40
We want to normalise discussions around a topic that isn’t really talked about much – struggling with intimacy and sex after NICU. Believe us, if you’re going through this difficult time right now, you are absolutely not alone! So many people have experienced this, and although it can be really difficult to work through, it is possible to come out the other side and feel much closer to your partner after the trauma of a NICU stay.
You might find that it’s much easier to discuss this with friends over your partner, or you also might find that you don’t want to discuss it with anyone at all. Whichever situation you find yourself in, we hope that in listening to this episode, you’ll realise that the way to move forward is by starting small. intimacy isn’t just about sex – it’s about eye contact, smiling at each other, feeling open and able to talk about things together and prioritising quality time over zoning out scrolling on your phone.
We’re also doing a deep-dive webinar into this topic on 28th February 2025, so if it’s something you’d like further support with, you can find the link in the section below.
In this episode, we’re chatting about:
- The challenges of intimacy after a NICU stay or birth trauma
- Why trauma leads to disconnection in relationships
- Common struggles experienced by NICU parents, like exhaustion and feeling “touched out”
- How past birth trauma can lead to “tokophobia” or the fear of birth or pregnancy
- Advice for reconnecting with your partner through small steps and prioritising the relationship beyond sex
Take what you need!
[00:48] You’re not alone when it comes to this “taboo” topic
[04:09] Why we struggle with intimacy and connection after NICU and birth trauma
[13:31] Adapting to life at home with your partner and baby after NICU
[17:30] What is tokophobia?
[21:17] Where to find practical advice for building connection and closeness with your partner
[22:38] How to have these kinds of conversations with other people (including your partner)
[27:02] Tuning back into yourself and filling your own cup
A huge thank you to Emma at Cover My Bubble for supporting our podcast - you can find out more about all that Cover My Bubble offer at www.covermybubble.co.uk
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